did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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