Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
