i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
