i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
