i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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