; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
