your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
