if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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