and next time when you feel me up, do it right
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
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