i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
