I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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