you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
How naked do you want me to be?
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