Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
