maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Randomize
