Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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