Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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