Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
