420 ftw
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize