I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
