It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
