yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
