imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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