My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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