So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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