discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
