I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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