I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
