can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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