Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Randomize
