drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
