i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
