we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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