dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
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