Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
