I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
