I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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