...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
