like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
