what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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