if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
honey bunches of taint.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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