he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
