Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize
