your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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