Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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