That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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