I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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