his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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