All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
he thought i was a dude.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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