i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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