I am puke
That's when you crack a 10am beer
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
