there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
